Saturday, April 23, 2011

The LuLac Edition #1563, April 23rd, 2011



This week I talked with a lady whose very first job was being an Easter Bunny.
Q: How old were you?
A: I just turned 15 but looked a bit older. My sister worked at the old Pomeroy’s downtown and got me in. The original Easter Bunny got drafted.
Q : Are you serious?
A: Yeah he never told them and when the ramp up to the holiday was starting, he wasn’t available. His grandmother who had some problems kept telling the store manager he’d be there 3 weeks before Easter. But she neglected to tell them he was in Germany.
Q: Why was she lying?
A: I think she was trying to hold his job and was getting a bit senile. I know she was an immigrant and went through coming here and also had a tough time during the Depression.
Q: What did you make an hour?
A: $1.20 and if there were left over peeps and candy I could have some.
Q: Wow, lucky you.
A: Yeah just what a teenage girl from GAR needs. More candy.
Q: Did you ever tell your friends? I would think you’d get teased to death.
A: Not when I was in school. My husband spilled the beans at our 20th class reunion. They all thought he was kidding.
Q: Where did you tell them you were going on Monday, Thursday and Saturdays?
A: I said I was studying during the week and going to Confession on Saturday.
Q: But you’re Methodist, right?
A: We were kids, no one paid much attention.
Q: Best part of the job?
A: I didn’t have to wear stockings and heels?
Q: Worst?
A: The strange looks from the matronly regulars who thought it was beneath the dignity of women to do that. Dressing up in a bunny suit was man’s work to them!
Q: They never heard of Playboy?
A: Oh jeez not these ladies!
Q: Any other part you didn’t like?
A: The smell. God the suit was awful.
Q: How many years did you do that?
A: Two, then I got myself into a keypunching class at WB Business College and never looked back.
Q: When you had little kids, did you take them to the Easter Bunny and critique him or her?
A: Nope, just wanted to get them in and out. The more they lingered, the more sugared up they’d be liable to get.
Q: Happy Easter.
A: You too.
Q: Will I see you on the bunny trail?
A: Only on a ski slope!


At 2:23 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Many many years ago, in the fifties, I figured out that the Easter Bunny at the Globe Store was a fraud. It was because of the terrible costume and I remember it to this day. In the half century since I have discovered that most things are not what they appear to be and it all started with that damn rabbitt!

At 12:42 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Silly wrabbit, tricks are for kids. and former hookers on s main.


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