The LuLac Edition #5, 756, September 2nd, 2026

 

WRITE ON WEDNESDAY

Our “Write on Wednesday” logo.

 

This week we look at the reason why President Trump WAS NOT invited to the 25^th anniversary of 911. Maggie Haberman broke the story, and it set Trump’s fake hair on fire. This is a solemn ceremony that doesn’t need to be a speech of grievance by the baby man child that is our thug pig President.

Here’s what went down.Looks like Trump blew his top! 

 

TRUMP, NATIVE NEW YORKER DENIED SPEAKING ROLE AT 911 CEREMONY

 

BREAKING: “MAGGOT” STRIKES BACK! HABERMAN REFUSES TO BACK DOWN AFTER TRUMP LAUNCHES A VILE ATTACK OVER HER 9/11 CEREMONY SCOOP!

New York Times reporter Maggie Haberman has finally responded to Donald Trump’s latest vicious personal attack on her, and she seems a lot more chill about the situation than he does.

“That’s objectively news,” Haberman told MS NOW Saturday this morning. “It wasn’t going to stay secret.”

The news in question is pretty embarrassing for a president who is a born-and-bred New Yorker: Trump plans to skip the 25th anniversary commemoration of the September 11 attacks at Ground Zero and attend a ceremony at the Pentagon instead.

Haberman’s scoop was  that part of the reason Trump isn’t going to Ground Zero is that he would not be permitted to speak there.

Trump reacted to the story about exactly as you would expect:

“Maggot Hagerman, the Fake Reporter from The Failing New York Times, an unattractive person both inside and out,” he raged on Truth Social Friday night.

Yes, a sexist dirty old man octogenarian  is again critiquing a woman’s appearance. We think the guy who does his hair in the world’s most preposterous combover and globs his face with ladies’ bronzer should desist from handing out beauty scores like for underage contestants in his beauty pageants of old. 

Trump went on to call Haberman a “stalker” and demanded that she “be forced to turn over any and all money that she’s made through her fake reporting on me.”

(“Any and all money.”  What a jerk. Seriously.)

He also threatened the Times with litigation and attacked Haberman’s use of confidential sources, claiming that if she were ever forced to reveal them, “you will find out they either don’t exist, or didn’t say what she reported.”

Inevitably asked about the attack, “Maggot” as usual didn’t take the bait.

“We were quite transparent with them about what we were reporting, including the part about that part of the reason why he was not going to New York,” she said, noting that the Times stands by the story. “Then 24 hours later, the president started attacking the piece.”

The White House has since offered another explanation:  that Trump will attend the Pentagon ceremony because Vice President J.D. Vance will be at Ground Zero and security protocols prevent the president and vice president from appearing publicly together.

But wait … but weren’t they together in public for Lindsey Graham’s funeral a month just a month ago?  Whatever …

The real point is that Trump’s attack on Haberman’s appearance, livelihood and confidential sources still doesn’t refute her reporting. It mostly demonstrates how furious he is that she reported it, and what a childish and awful human being he is. 

And kudos to Haberman for being so sanguine about the whole spectacle. We suppose raising three kids while doing a job where the phone rings at any hour of the day or night. She might simply be too busy, or too tired, to care whether an old man with a prehistoric view of women thinks she’s pretty.

Haberman has taken heat over the years for what detractors call “access journalism,” and we could debate whether her extreme closeness to Trumplandia sometimes comes at a cost.

Being publicly called “Maggot” and “unattractive... inside and out” by the president of the United States because she reported something he didn’t want reported shouldn’t be one of them.

Like she said, what’s objectively news isn’t going to stay secret whether she writes it or somebody else does.

Nor should it.

 

The LuLac Edition #5, 755, September 1rst, 2026

 

TRUMP ATTACKS WELKER IN 

BABY MAN FIT

Treating the Federal Communications Commission like his own personal enforcer, President Donald Trump said on social media Sunday that NBC’s Kristen Welker would be “reported to the FCC for rebuke or punishment” over a TV segment he didn’t like.

In a separate post, Trump complained in all caps about “fake polls” and said “something must be done about it,” adding, “FCC to the rescue!”

The posts were Trump’s most explicit efforts yet to direct the FCC to carry out his wishes. FCC Chair Brendan Carr, a Trump appointee and close ally, did not respond to CNN’s request for comment on the matter.

Trump posted a long missive Sunday about what he described as mischaracterizations of his endorsement record in primaries.

He wrote: “Kristen Welker, the Unpopular ‘Hostess’ of the once great Meet the Press, now considered Meet the Fake Press, just stated that Donald Trump has ‘mixed results’ on his Endorsements of Candidates, when the recent WINS of Darline Graham and Mike Mazzei, stand at 100% for the U.S. Senate, and 98% for the U.S. House, recently and over the long-term. How can anyone be allowed to say this, working for freely given Public Airwaves?”

The FCC has limited power over issues like this, and its own website states the agency “cannot prevent the broadcast of any particular point of view,” so the notion of “punishment” for Welker, the moderator of NBC’s “Meet the Press,” would historically be a nonstarter.

Trump sat for a long interview with Welker earlier in the year.  He was combative but not off the rails. All Welker did this time was say that not every candidate Trump supported WON. The is the truth but apparently there is no bottom for Trump.  Is it any wonder that the guy has a 30% popularity rating.

Back in June Trump did walk out on Welker after she asked tough questions by saying ‘You’re Either Crooked Or You’re Stupid”. She was/is neither.

But he certainly is the crooked and dumbest son of a bitch of a President WE EVER HAD! (CNN, LuLac)

 

AND THEN THERE’S THIS:

TRUMP DEMANDS ALL CANADIAN COMPANIES DOING BUSINESS WITH THE US MOVE TO AMERICA IMMEDIATELY

 

Donald Trump sought to escalate his trade war with Canada on Sunday afternoon and issued a demand on Truth Social that Canadian companies wanting to do business with the U.S. reshore their headquarters within its borders.

His latest remarks come as Canadian officials warned that the country was prepared for an extended dispute with the U.S. after trade talks collapsed and Trump announced tariffs as high as 50 percent on some Canadian goods including dairy products and lumber. Canada has levied reciprocal tariffs against U.S. steel, aluminum and other exports.

On Sunday afternoon, the president said Canadian companies should move their headquarters and production facilities to avoid newly imposed tariffs. The duties are set to begin in 2027.

“Let all Canadian Companies that are doing business with America move to the United States, immediately. Many of them are Companies that moved out years ago due to stupid U.S. Leadership. When you move back, there are no TARIFFS!” Trump wrote.

In a separate post, he argued that Canada was one of America’s worst trading partners, despite being its second largest. Canada and the U.S. conduct close to $900 billion in cross-border economic activity each year, according to the U.S. trade representative.

Trump is the drunken uncle your family wants to avoid at all costs. And why would Canada even consoder moving to this country when a shithead like Trump is running things into ground? (The Independent, LuLac)

 

 

The LuLac Edition #5, 754, September 1st, 2026

SEPTEMBER!

The LuLac Edition #5, 753, August 31st, 2026

 MONDAY MEMES 

The LuLac Edition #5, 752, August 30th, 2026

 

THE OUTSHINE BAR RECALL

Dreyer’s Grand Ice Cream has announced it has initiated a voluntary recall of multiple varieties of its Outshine Fruit Bars because they may be contaminated with glass.

The company released a statement Aug. 16 saying the bars have been recalled “due to possible foreign material contamination with glass.”

Dreyer’s says no illnesses or injuries have been reported in connection with the recall and anyone who is “concerned about an injury” should reach out to a doctor. Consumers who bought the recalled items are advised to throw them out or return them for a refund.

“The safety, quality, and integrity of our products remain our highest priority,” Dreyer’s said.

“We sincerely apologize for any inconvenience this action may cause our consumers and retail customers. We remain committed to maintaining the highest standards of food safety and quality and to earning the trust of our consumers and customers every day.”

Here’s a look at which products have been recalled:

Outshine Strawberry 6-Count 2.5 ounce Fruit Bars with UPC 041548610047

Outshine Strawberry Fruit Bars

Outshine Grape 6-Count 2.5 ounce Fruit Bars

with UPC 041548244044

Outshine Watermelon 6-Count 2.5 ounce Fruit Bars with UPC 041548413624

Outshine Tangerine 6-Count 2.5 ounce Fruit Bars with UPC 041548612041

 

 

BEST‑BEFORE DATES IN RECALL

The recalled lots have best‑before dates ranging from June 30, 2027, to November 30, 2027, depending on the flavor and batch

Strawberry: Best before 30 SEP 2027 or 31 OCT 2027 or 30 NOV 2027

Watermelon: Best before 30 JUN 2027 or 31 JUL 2027

Grape: Best before 30 SEP 2027 or 31 OCT 2027

Tangerine: Best before 31 OCT 2027

 

PRINGLES LAUNCH BRAND’S ‘THICKEST CRISP EVER’

Pringles is adding some heft with thicker chips designed for dipping.

Pringles Dippers is sturdier than traditional Pringles and feature wavy crisps designed to scoop and hold dip. The new line comes in three flavors: original, French onion and bacon cheddar.

“We know it can be frustrating if your typical salty dipping vessel prevents your perfect scoop or breaks as you dip, which is why we’ve created Pringles Dippers,” Eileen Flaherty-Yao, senior director of salty at Mars Snacking North America, said in a statement. “Our iconic parabolic shape is now thicker and wavier than ever – built to handle any dipping style from light dips to heavy scoops.”